You'd better run if Jenn's got a gun. I'm sure you're impressed by what you saw on the video. The GoosInator isn't a goose's worst nightmare -- I am. We also have more media at this Page!! Poop -- there it is! With this new technology, we promise that you will be very satisfied with this durable product because it is:
Hi, My name is Mike Ratcliff and I've been a maintenance tech and specialist at two golf courses for the last 17 years And here again on Fox News: It's made by a local, family-owned company, which is a plus, out of "a durable foam with special additives and injected into a molded product. I checked out the GoosInator on its creator's company website. Bring Occupy Denver back instead. It's also seventeen inches tall, twenty-four inches wide, and forty inches long "with colors and predator-like features that are guaranteed to make geese very nervous. Why can't the city find a less-costly way to get the damn birds off the damn lawns -- like buying a few vintage Teddy Ruxpin bears at yard sales, putting almost-dead batteries in them, and setting them up in the parks? Within one week my customers asked me, 'Where are the geese? I sincerely hope that whoever bought these kept the receipts, or at least got the extended warranty plan. The GoosInator isn't a goose's worst nightmare -- I am. They are gonna hang out in the parks, anyway, so why not pay them to clean up the goose pies, and give them gloves, scoopers and perhaps bag lunches -- with granola and boxes of low-fat milk -- for extra incentive? Unpaid college interns should be abused -- not rewarded. If you like this story, consider signing up for our email newsletters. Our biggest frustration was chasing the geese off of the grass and watching them fly right into the lakes on our golf course. They can run but they can't hide from my eagle-eyes, and if Denver Parks and Recreation gives me the green light to slaughter and scatter every goose in this town, I won't charge them a dime. We are looking forward to a spring when we don't have to spend countless hours repairing goose damage. I'm ancient enough to recall the days when college students doing internships were abused in non-creative ways, like being used as donut- and dry-cleaning fetchers. With this new technology, we promise that you will be very satisfied with this durable product because it is: I'm sure you're impressed by what you saw on the video. Do you have a goose problem that you would like to eliminate? We also have more media at this Page!! And as for the fifty-odd goose-doober complaints a week, instead of buying expensive goose-chasing machines, why not pay a few extra humans to man the city phone lines and tell callers who bitch about goose-dumplings to watch where they are walking, and quit whining? It is unbelievable we have zero geese now that the goosinator patrols our property. Poop -- there it is! These tasks weren't at all glamorous, but they were character-building exercises specifically designed to prepare these noobs for their grown-up jobs later on -- or at least make them mad enough to succeed, and then hold long enough grudges to abuse their own unpaid interns someday. Randy with the Finished Design
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